Bridal Dilemma: Writing you own wedding vows
Unless you’re one with words writing vows for your wedding ceremony is no easy feat. Figuring out exactly what you want to say is made especially difficult when it can often be hard to find words which adequately express your feelings. While you may come across a range of articles and books telling you how to write the perfect vows you’ll soon realise there are no rules. The point of opting to write your own vows is to ensure they perfectly encapsulate what you as a couple are feeling in that moment, something that is so unique and beautiful simply cannot come word for word from a book.
There is however a few tips and tricks that can help get your creative juices flowing if words are failing you – even the best of writer’s experience writer’s block. Using templates of wording and verses or examples of other vows can spark an idea or form the basis of what you will work off. You can stick with traditional vows and then personalise them by rewording them to fit your relationship. Alternatively you might like to slightly alter modern vows that you find online to reflect you and your partner’s personalities. Sourcing vow templates online can alleviate some of the pressure you will feel to write something comparable to a movie. Because let’s be honest our expectations for most romantic moments are set by what we see in the media.
If you do happen to find a quote from a movie or television show that you absolutely adore, it might even be a lyric from a song and you feel it communicates exactly what you cannot there is no harm in ‘borrowing’ it. However make sure to avoid any clichés such as ‘to me, you are perfect’ a la Love Actually I think that one has had its day. As with traditional vows you can also tailor the lyric or movie quote to make it more personal and not so obviously borrowed.
PHOTO CREDITS: KAT STANLEY PHOTOGRAPHY
If you are going to tackle writing your own wedding vows from scratch a simple trick to structure your vows is to reflect on your past, mention the present and then propose your future together. This is a relatively simple format and when done right can be quite beautiful and moving or funny depending on your personality and what you choose to include. Sweet moments will come from recalling special or unique memories from your relationship – how you met, when you knew they were the one, the proposal, meeting the parents etc. While witty remarks are always a winner such as making hilarious yet completely truthful promises such as ‘I promise to always kill any spider that dare enter our house and disturb your peace’.
The ultimate foolproof plan for writing your own wedding vows is to talk about what you love about your partner (their personality, something they do) you might trail off a whole list or keep it to one central point. Either way telling someone why you love them will not only make their heart flutter but move all your guests as well.
The key to writing perfect wedding vows is to keep them relatively short and straight to the point. Condense any long winded stories as this may cause your guests to lose focus and inevitably get distracted. Remember 1-2 minutes is plenty. If all else fails just trust your instinct, you’ll know what your future husband or wife will want to hear.